Where to start....

Well it has been a long time since I have blogged but recently I have gained a lot of time on my hands. No time like the present.  Most people didn't even know that Graham and I were expecting our third baby.  Just over a week ago I had gone for my 12 week ultrasound and everything looked wonderful.  Baby was moving and grooving, measuring perfectly, and everything looked healthy.  I was finally at that point where I felt comfortable telling people, graham and I were throwing names around, and taking about bunk beds for the girls.  It really felt real.

Fast forward to Tuesday morning.  Everything was a normal, rushed getting out of the door morning.  Up until this day, the pregnancy had been great with no issues.  I had an early morning meeting which I had no clue would be my last for awhile.  After the meeting, the bell rang for school to start and across the radio I heard about a student who had been hit by a car.  I ran outside with a couple of our administrators.  Still feeling good.  About 15 minutes later, I made my way back to my office where with in minutes the bleeding started.  The bleeding was pretty severe to where I wouldn't be able to leave my office.  With all the bleeding, I never had any pain or cramping.  As all this is going on my co workers were so caring and helpful.  One went to target to get me new underwear and some sweats.  Another drove me to the doctor where Graham met us at the door.  I could not have made it through that morning without them.

Waiting to see a doctor was so painfully long.  I was assuming the worst but questioning why and what was going on when everything looked so good last week.  When the doctor came in the first thing she did was look for the heartbeat and we saw it on the screen.  At that point, we were feeling better and I was more hopeful.  I was now scheduled for an ultrasound with the tech to try to find a cause for the bleeding.  I had already been told they were going to admit me to the hospital for at least 24-48 hours because of the amount of bleeding, but over the next 24 hours I had no clue how drastically our lives were going to change.  

I was diagnosed with a subchorionic hemorrhage.  The ultrasound tech was even confused because she had just seen me six days prior and it didn't show on the last ultrasound. So we had an answer but our journey wouldn't end there.  It has taken me two days to really wrap my head around the severity of my hemorrhage .  These are more common in early first trimester pregnancies and are usually smaller as in 2 to 3 cm in length.  Mine is 16 cm in length and I am much further along as I am about to start my second trimester.  As for a cause, we don't know.  I was asked if I had done anything out of the ordinary, fallen, or had any trauma. However, because of the record breaking rainfalls I had really been a lazy bum!  

So here is our reality.  I am still at a very high risk of miscarrying.  This reality is very scary as I feel like we are just holding our breath.  At this point, I am on bed rest most likely for most of my pregnancy.  Start doing the math in your head of how long that is going to be and you can see how this is going to change all of our lives.  That reality is for another post.  

I was discharged yesterday afternoon and have started my first day of bed rest at home.  Right now we wait for our weekly doctors appointment.  I will have an ultrasound every week to see if the bleed is healing.  So our first goal is to get to next Wednesday.  During the last 48 hours, notes, emails, texts, calls have kept me going.  They really make my day and knowing people are keeping my family in their thoughts and prayers is the best feeling ever.  I promise to keep everyone updated through the blog and please know we cannot thank the people around us who have been so helpful!