So this is my venting post and a post to remember the sleeping habits of my second child. Please don't judge me or give me advice. Trust me I have already googled 2 year old sleeping habits and I am doing everything they recommend I just have one stubborn @#!@ little girl. She is cute and snuggly and funny and so many other things but she has never quite been the sleeper my first child was. However, they are completely different personalities and that shows in their sleeping habits. Lets compare:
Julia
Can count on one hand the number of nights she has ever slept in our bed - 2 (I am not kidding)
Sleeps with the door closed
Put her to sleep and we never heard a peep. No stalling or crying, just went to bed.
Not a snuggler.
Transition to big girl bed, not an issue and until she was almost 4 would wait until we came and got her.
Gave up her paci and never looked back.
Went to bed at reasonable hour and even though she tends to get up early has started to sleep later.
Caroline
Has slept in bed with Graham and I an obscene number of times
Snuggler to the max. Wants her back rubbed, wants to rock in the rocking chair, etc.
Must have door open.
Tends to get scared at the smallest of sounds.
Paci transition - worst decision of my life. I took it away for many reasons but what I wouldn't do to have it back. Mainly since we took it away naps are a disaster although they seem to be getting better, but putting her to bed at night....we will come back to.
Big girl transition.... lets start our story here:
I know this post is all over the place but stay with me. Caroline has never been the nighttime sleeper Julia was but compared to some of the horror stories I hear, I counted my blessings. She went to bed easily and took great naps. Some nights we had to get up multiple times but then she would have great stretches of sleeping through the night. This was all when we had a pacifier. Now going to bed at night is the biggest struggle. She stalls, cries, fights with her mom or her mom fights with her. Let me remind you we have never had this problem in 2 years. Some nights are better, but the last couple have been horrendous. Now I know some of you are saying let her cry it out, but she is a stubborn soul and let me tell you she would go for hours. I have tried:( So we thought we would move her to a big girl bed and she would be so excited that maybe nighttime would be better. We ended up moving her and for three nights she did pretty well until last night.... Graham had school and I fought with this child for 45 minutes while she cried and cried. However, this time her scream was different and she seemed scared. Of course Julia is awake because as she puts it, "Caroline had a bad night!" I didn't want to keep Julia up anymore as she had school the next day so I put her back in the crib. Yup didn't have time to take it down, so I plopped her back in and she went right to sleep. I will admit I am not perfect in the parenting field but I think I do a pretty good job. However, now not only am I kicking myself for taking away the pacifier, I am now probably going to have to pay therapy bills for putting her back in her crib. Oh the saga. I am going to stop here and I won't give you the story of how tonight went. I miss the day of laying her down and her going to sleep peacefully. A month ago I thought we were over the hump because things were going so well and then we went downhill. I have many excuses as to why she is having the issues she is having but more than anything I just want to try and figure out how to fix the issues. I know that if I keep the routine up and as she gets older that it will get better but I hate the waiting thing. So frustrating! The above pictures are what we thought was the last night in the crib... oh well!
6 comments:
Poor Kat!!! I have a stubborn one myself. I have yet to figure it out. My friend said the only answer to "what's wrong?" is "she is TWO, that's what's wrong!" KK threw herself on the ground in the parking lot at daycare (like face down on asphault) and someone said "what's wrong?" I snottily said "she's TWO!" I wanted to say "stop judging asshole" but I kept that to myself. Good luck with the sleeping thing. Not that it makes you feel better but we're having potty training refusal over here so I'll be changing diapers for the rest of my life. Apparently she likes crapping her pants. Awesome.
PS I hate the KK is just as stubborn as me. Lately we've been battling 24/7 and I'm just exhausted! I had to take my own time out the other night and hand her off so I could collect myself.
PPS YOU ARE AN AMAZING PARENT!
When it comes to sleep my doctor always says, "Just do what you need to do to survive, we can fix anything"
Screw what you are supposed to do, and do what your kid needs. If they don't want potty training and big girl beds then so be it. Kindergarten teachers always tell parents not to push their kids to read. They might not be ready. Same here
Good luck tonight!
I agree with Robyn. Do what you gotta do to survive. Crib, your bed, binky, blankie, ... Survival mode baby! I always find myself getting so wrapped up in what is the "right" thing, but everyone is just different. And you need sleep too!
Also, a friend suggested the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It's pretty helpful, and my neighbor and I pass it back and forth for both of our kids since the issues are forever changing!
I love you, Kat! Statistically, I'm thinking Julia had the unusual sleep habits. ;) Contrary to what it felt like everyone said, my sleepless children have all learned to sleep and all of those nights of fighting and crying feel like a distant memory. We do need a wine and movie night so we can hug it out. ;) Love you all!!!
aww. I know too well. No advice, no judgement. I think parents are too hard on themselves without that.
I think you are doing great. No big deal if you have to switch it up. Heck, River was sleeping on our hard wood floor for a couple weeks (and I didn't do too much to make it more comfortable) when Nora was first born. And Nora just started sleepwalking and peeing in the pantry (thinking it's the toilet,) can we say, GREAT!
I hate to say it, but just as soon as you get over one hump or hurdle, there is usually another quickly approaching. This is what makes it FUN (enter sarcastic eye roll here.)
Good thing you made them so dang cute!!!!
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